Dark India

It was during my trip to India, when I saw a very dark side of India. It was a long refreshing tour for me with many positive energy reinstalled but I was touched with few negative aspects as well.

My overall trip was mainly from train and to many religious places. And I found a commonality between my trip destination and vehicle used for trip. It was obvious that I would find many beggars outside the temple and in the train. But something that struck me were the 'panda' (priest) in temple and the gay people in the train. The gay people collected Rs10 with each adult boy in the name of social service whereas, the pandas asked the devotees to pay high price as 'Dakshina' in the name of God. And these things were compulsory. They were forcefully made to pay. Both of them were looting people in a way. It was really a dark side of India.

Many devotees and tourists from all over the world come to visit India. They travel through train visit different temples but when they are looted in this way every single day, they may no longer desire to come to India. India is prospering day by day, it is setting a good image in the world but there are many small aspects which is revealing its darker sides. It is setting a very negative image of India among the visitors.

My trip

Trip can really change a life ,a situation, a person. The person I was before this trip is like a stranger to me now. These days I wonder how materalistic I had become in those days. This trip helped me to know the real me and energized my soul.

When I got in the bus of Delhi from Kathmandu, I was unknown that I had that power to take my life from negative to positive. Slowly, I was leaving Kathmandu behind. At the end of the day, I left Nepal behind as well. I was excited entering India. It was really late when I saw Ayoudha city from the window of my bus. It looked so amazing. It was sparkling in the dark.

Next day, I reached my destination Vrindawan. The divine land welcomed me with its cool breeze. Three days spent there were wonderful. Four years back the feeling was different and now I felt something else. Now it was time to leave Vrindawan and move to Haridwar. I travelled to Haridwar in the night bus and reached my destination the next morning. 

My father's friend was organizing "Saptaha" in the holy place. It lasted for 7 days and it was really great. I met a lot of new people and felt blessed. I wanted to see Deharadun city which was only 2 hrs far from Haridwar. I forced my parents to take me there on the 7th day. We went there and I found the place to be 'twin brother' of Kathmandu. It reminded me of Kathmandu. We returned hurring and exchanged good byes with them. All of them left the place on the 7th day but we had a train on the 8th day so we stayed. When they were leaving I felt a bit bad. I was really thankful to them for these wonderful days. The place seemed really empty without them but I had already understood too much attachment was not good.

The next day , we took the train to Puri. I still remember when I was in grade 4, I had a friend with surname Puri. Oneday, I heard that there was a temple named "Jagannath Puri" in India. I was really shocked and who knew today, I would be seeing the place with my very own eyes.

It was a long journey from Haridwar to Puri. Those two days were somehow beneficial. I got opportunity to see different states of India and "Chattisgad" was really beautiful. It was mainly industrial area but its natural beauty was gorgeous. Even "Tatanagar" looked great, which was full of light in the dark night. My father told me that all the items of tata brand were made there. I said to myself "Really India has progressed a lot". I met many people during this trip and got an opportunity to view their life closely.

We had almost reached our destination. It was 4 o' clock in the morning when I got awakened. When I looked around, almost all the passengers had left and I could see the sprinkles of rain in the window glass. A passenger of our compartment had told us that it was raining in Odisha and it really was. Few people were saying that it was due to the cyclone. 

As soon as we reached Puri, I was delighted by the atmosphere. We visited the "Jagannath Temple" and went to the beach. I can't express how great I felt being in Puri. It was a great feeling which I may never experience again.

Next day was the time to leave the place. We went to the temple and the beach. I captured these places in my camera and eyes. Now, we were heading to Kolkota. I was too excited to see this place. Few years back, Messi was in Kolkota so, I was very eager to step on this land.

Our train got late by 2 hrs so, Kolkota welcomed us at 12 am. The city looked great in the night. The city was covered all over with lights. It was too late so, we had some difficulty finding a vehicle and a place to stay. It was almost 1 am when we found a place to stay but it was not as good as expected. I found Kolkota to be worst than Kathmandu. There were long traffic jams, the city was too dirty and crowded.

Next morning, we went to "Nawadip Dham" the birthplace of "Chaitanya Mahaprabhu". This place was really peaceful but our journey to this place was really hard. For the first time, I travelled in local compartment and experienced the real life of people in this city. 

Second day in Kolkota was a bit good. We had a lot of bus trips and it was fun. Buses in kolkota are really big. I think Kathmandu needs such buses which would make the trip more easier. Early in the morning, we went to the famous 'Kalighat' temple and 'Dakshineshwor' temple respectively. Later, we visited zoo where we saw 'Giraffe, Lion and the Bengal Tiger' too closely. 

In the late afternoon, we took a train to 'Gowahati'. I was a bit sad as I hadn't tasted 'Misti Dahi' of Kolkota yet and now I was leaving the place. But luckily, I tasted it in the train. Next morning, I got awekened and felt the cold atmosphere. We had almost reached our destination. I saw many lotus in my way. I was stunned seeing the Brahmaputra river. It was really huge.

During this trip to Gowahati, I found something really strange. The police were marching here and there every single hour. They were moving from one compartment to the next. My father told me that 'Assam' was terrorist affected area so, the police were observing every single individual travelling to 'Assam' more closely. 

A day in 'Assam' was really great. In the morning, after completing breakfast, we went to the zoo. This zoo was the best zoo I had ever visited. The zoo was inside a jungle where wild animals were semi-caged. In the afternoon, we went to the 'Kamakya' temple. While returning, I was delighted seeing the city full of lights. I liked 'Assam' a lot. It was clean and really beautiful as it was situated in the bank of 'Brahmaputra' river.

Next day, we had a train to New Jalpaiguri, from where we had a plan to go to Darjeeling for a night stay. Slowly, this trip was coming to an end. The journey in the train was fun. Few hours before reaching the station, there was a wonderful view of mountain, which gave a signal that Nepal was near. We reached the station and took a vehicle to Silguri, from where we had planned to go Darjeeling. But unluckily, we couldn't find any vehicle going to Darjeeling so we decided to stay in Silguri and go to Darjeeling the next morning.

Next morning, we got up very early and travelled to Darjeeling. The way was perfect, well paved way, surrounded with trees on both sides. We even saw the sun rise and the beautiful sceneries. As soon as I saw Mt.Kanchanjunga, I felt like it was heaven. I felt God always plans best for us. If we had reached Darjeeling the previous day, we couldn't view Darjeeling in this way. And what an artist God was I saw the ocean, I saw the mountains, I saw the deserted land, I saw the evergreen forest, I saw the hills, I saw the flat lands and everything was so perfect. Everything looked beautiful in its own way which taught me that everything in this world is beautiful.

After that, we went to Illam and than Jhapa, where we viewed the tea estate. Now, our next destination was Kathmandu. It was time to bring this trip to an end. Finally, we reached Kathmadu. After staying in India for more than 22 days, I realised how good were the roads of India. 

During this trip, every single individual I met thought that I was a Bengali girl. This thing always made me laugh. This trip was refreshing and really beneficial for me. I learned  the importance of every creation of God.

Love : not a hindrance

Between the phase of entering crying and exiting making others cry is a short period which we call life. In this life , there is love, dreams, money, desires etc. Love makes our life colourful, dreams give us reason to live, money makes our life comfortable and fulfillment of desire generates a desire in us to extend the period of our life.

We have so many thing in our life but among them love is the most beautiful thing. It is the best feeling one can experience but sometimes we think our dreams, money and  desires are above all and we try to avoid love. When we act so cruel and rude to love, we get so badly cursed that in future love may never return back to us. There may be a time when we will have achieved our dreams, earned enough money and fulfilled almost all desired but will be thirsty for love and that thirst may never be quenched.

If you are truly passionate about your dreams, you will never be distracted from it. So, please stop blaming love if u can't achieve your dreams. Love is not a hindrance and it can never distract anyone. Hence, never avoid love. There may come a situation when you will be wanting love so badly but will never receive it. That time the only thing you can do is regret.

Hidden stories of time !!!

Meeting him by chance became the best part of my life. I had obviously imagined to meet him one day but I wasn't sure that it would turn into reality. I could now feel his presence in my every heartbeat.

Whenever I saw him with her, happy and smiling , instead of being jealous , I used to get pleasure. Obviously I used to get hurt but I could experience the pleasure of true love even in that hurt.

She was everything for him and he had become everything to me. So, his happiness was that all mattered. It was almost time for me to leave the place. I wanted to share my feelings to him because I wasn't sure if I could see him again. He was really sweet. He offered me a lift and I was really happy seeing a chance to express myself. But all of sudden she also entered inside the car which almost ruined my plan.

I asked if she could drive the car. Since it was my last day I wanted to see how she drives. She was okay with it and I saw a ray of hope. She drove us to airport and got busy searching for parking. Meanwhile, he took my luggage and we moved on. I thought it is my only chance and I decided to express it.

I told him how I felt about him and adored him. He obviously understood that I was madly in love with him. He told me that he respected my feelings but loved someone else. He told me that he always adored my chocolaty brown eyes, my friendly nature. I was happy hearing it but at the same time couldn't control my tears. There was an announcement and I had to go. He hugged me for the last time and I don't know the tears that rolled down my cheeks were full of pain or pleasure.

After that hug I walked straight not looking back once. Soon I got disappeared in the crowd and the aeroplane in which I was traveling got disappeared in the cloud while he was still staring at it. While landing, the aeroplane met an accident, many people died on the spot but inside me still a life is left.

I am lying motionless here and I know my time has come. I had always wished that someone would have crush on me. In this life, I wasn't that lucky enough but I will return back to see the beauty of my country, to be a part of football game and to fall in love with someone with those pleasing and magical eyes. And now my watch has ended.

The End...

Hidden stories of time !!

I was born in the late 90s but had never found the actual meaning of my presence in this world until today when death was approaching me. As, I was born in a Hindu- Brahmin family, I have a great faith in God and I believe God sent me in this planet to experience love which was incomplete.

The day when I saw his charming eyes, he was a stranger to me by his name. I didn't know his name but I felt as if I had known him since centuries. When my brother called out his name, I realized I had heard his name before. Since then, I always dreamt of meeting him and now I have.

It was during the summer, in which I had to travel to Argentina for completing my assignment, I met him. I was given a task by American Psychological Association (APA) to do research in any one of the football teams. Doing research on big teams worth lots of money and difficulties so I decided to conduct  my research on Newell's Boys Club in Rosario. And luckily he was working with the local club.

My research work made me easier to meet him but having a conversation with him was a lot difficult. I was poor in Spanish and he had no idea about Nepali language but then English language helped a bit. After meeting him I realized " people all over the world understand a common language which is language of love" was somehow true.

I spent 3 months there and those were the best days of my life. I had heard Argentina and Nepal didn't have good relation but now a Nepali and an Argentine had developed a good friendship. And the best part was the feeling like being home again after so many years.

He was a lot more shy in the beginning, he simply answered my questions but slowly he accepted me as a friend.We started sharing stuffs and I started knowing him better. It is said that if you are meant to fall in love with someone, even a single day is enough and for me 3 months were enough to experience true feeling of love.

Today when I look into his eyes I can't see love in it. All that I can see is his care and affection for me but I know whenever he looks into my eyes he can see what he means to me, he can see love in it. But what is the use now? It is worthless to open my eyes and look at him but I can remember my old memories keeping my eyes close........

To be continued....

Hidden stories of time !

I am surrounded by darkness. I can feel pain all over my body. I feel exhausted. I know my body is too weak and tired now. Many people have laid down in this bed and recovered. Some may have died too and now I also want to "Rest in Peace".

The man ,whom I have loved and adored my entire life ,is sitting next to me. I know he wants me to recover. Maybe he wants to tell something to me but I am in no mood. If I started listening to him I will see only tears. I don't want that. I just want to go to flashbacks of those sweet memories in the streets of my home town, those wonderful sceneries of my country, his magical eyes and beautiful smile and the day I fell in love.

It all began during the 2010 world cup and I didn't know it would change my life in this way. I saw his magical eyes in those game schedules. Wow ! they were so beautiful and pleasing. Even when I remember them today tears of joy roll down my cheeks. And his smile, when I see it I start smiling myself. I had decorated my rooms with his posters and used to stare at them every night before sleeping. I was addicted to him. He was a drug to me and there was no anti-dose.

Like his every other fan, I too wanted to meet him, talk to him, click selfies with him but who knew he would be sitting by my side in my last moment. I don't know about love but I adored him since the day I saw his pictures. Maybe love emerged when I met him and started knowing him more deeply. At first I was attracted to him like every other fan but when I met him I fell in love with him truly and believe me I had never had such magical feeling before.

Today if he tells me only once to open my eyes and try to recover, I would do that without thinking twice. I really don't wish to take rebirth. Who idiot will take rebirth to do all those hard work? Fall in love? Get your heart broken? But I have to return one day to complete my incomplete story. But for now it is better to close my eyes and go to flashbacks until death approaches me....

To be continued....

Messi

Football is such a game in which a team cannot win a match by the performance of a single player. It requires unity, coordination, passion, focus among the players, strategy of the coach, and most importantly hard work of each and every member of the team (coach,player,sports psychologist etc.) to make a team win a match. So, how can a single player be blamed if a team has to face defeat?   

Recently, Argentina had to face a bad defeat in Copa-America finals against Chile and we can see whole world is directly or indirectly blaming Lionel Messi for it. Yes, it is true that he hasn’t achieved any big trophy with his national team but we can at least see his and his teammates hard work which made them able to secure a place in finals. The heartbroken and emotionally disturbed Messi decided to retire from his international football career thinking he was never meant to win any big trophy with his national team. He may have his own reasons for this decision but no doubt his decision is wrong. He should not give up after all he has made his team reach to finals four times. But no wonder he has too much pressure and is emotionally disturbed.

I observed people around me and their reaction regarding this matter. I found maximum people to be thinking Messi always does this, he plays well from Barcelona but never from his country, he has no love for his country and I find this opinion totally wrong. Messi started playing from Barcelona since he was 13. He plays well from Barcelona because it has been many years since he joined FCB and got used to its playing style “tiki-taka”. But the football of Argentina is totally different. He started playing from the national team just 9-10 years ago but still we can see his passion for his country in his game. His teammates and he has been able to secure a place in the world cup finals, Copa -America finals. Not only this, we know very well that while playing from Barcelona too he has traveled through many dark phases. So, how can we say he plays perfect from Barcelona and worst from Argentina? Every day is not Sunday. In life we have to go through many ups and downs and this is one of the darkest phases of his life and I believe once again he will rise because we know after the darkest night there always comes the brightest morning.

So, Messi is a legend and will always be. Right now he is a bit upset but his fans believe he will reconsider his decision and achieve a major glory with his beloved country.

Love o love

Love was not just a mere word in my life. It always had a great importance. But I could only know its true essence after experiencing it. I loved Messi as a fan, God as a devotee but was it enough for me to truly understand love? No, it was never enough.

Experiencing love was really impossible for me but something magical happened then. I had never imagined this. I never knew I was so special. I still don't understand these things, they are really complicated. But what i am feeling is quite pleasing. I am not fully into it but I will one day that is what I believe.

Hope!

I am tired of explaining, no one is there to understand
I am falling apart, no longer I can stand

My complains are useless, no one can hear it
My feelings are worthless, I cannot share it

I have almost lost myself, now it is hard to find
The only mistake I made was following my heart rather than mind

Now I need to find myself and be bold as ever
Only I can help myself, there's no one other

So, I accept your challenge world , let us begin the game
One day I will be somebody and earn all the fame
I shall fulfill my dream and win this game
And you might be hiding somewhere with all that shame!!!

Leon^2

Her life moved with the flow of time. She used to get close with someone sharing all her stuffs but then her fear of getting hurt would surround her. Her fear was worthy because she had already made three mistakes in her life. So, she simply believed only Leon was there who would not use her weaknesses against her.

Shren was a over-thinker but she never used to come to a proper conclusion without analyzing things.  That was her speciality and her aim was somehow related to it. Everybody believed she would get very far in terms of her academic and career success but nobody could say anything about her love life.

Some believed she was an emotional fool and anti-social but now she was a different person. She had started interacting with people more than anytime but her gullible nature was a hindrance. People would lie to her; most of them but she would believe them.

Time passed on and now she was in her mid twenties. She had a good degree in her hand and a better job offer in Spain , where she believed to find her Leon. Everything was going well, finally she was going to find her love. She landed in Barcelona and went to visit the city. She entered that very dream place of many youths : Camp Nou. It was such a delightful experience for her. Her face was glowing with happiness as she was going to work for FCB.

It was first day of her job and she was a little nervous. The city was new to her, the people were new to her except one :Leon. She entered the club office and then the president of the club greeted her. He took her to a visit all around the office and then to the training ground. He called out 'Leo'. It was him with those shining eyes and that cute smile, whom she imagined as her Leon. It was "Lionel Andres Messi"; manager of FCB and now she was working under him.

As soon as, she had been introduced to him, he offered a handshake. And his touch in her hand nearly took her breath. She knew it was almost impossible for him to love her like she did him imagining 'Leon' but she was thankful to god at least she could see him daily.

Shren knew there were million of girls out there who loved him but she believed her love was something different. She knew the true meaning of love which means only giving neither expecting or taking anything. She knew it was never necessary for him to love her too. So, she was happy that she found him finally. Her feelings for him was a mystery to the world whereas, he gave their relationship a name of friendship.

Leon

The time has gone
Waiting you for long
When will you come?
Oh! My Leon !

She kept on reciting this stanza day and night. Why wouldn't she ? After all she had composed it herself for the one and only who had been residing in her heart. She believed one day he would come to accompany her in this world where almost no one understood her. She had given herself a name "Shren".

Shren was like every other girl : beautiful eyes , pretty smile and a gentle heart. She criticized wrong things and used to apologize whenever it was necessary. Sometimes her ego would block her vision but it used to last no longer. Only few understood  her and adored her.

She liked making new friends , talking about stuffs. She used to communicate with her invisible Leon  believing he was with her every second. She knew though she hadn't met him in real , he exists. Somewhere , somehow , someday she would meet him. She had faith that her feelings for Leon is not worthless. She was sure that she wasn't hallucinating but she was tired of waiting and was running out of patience.

"He exists and we will be together one day";replied Shren whenever her friends used to mock at her for being single all these days. It was a trend for boys and girls to be in relationship. They used to frequently patch up and break up but Shren had never had such experience. She just wanted to wait for him.

She was just 18 and struggling with her study. She knew she should study to find her love. She never neglected it because neglecting her studies would mean she no longer desires to meet him. So, she continued to study.

To be continued.......

Smile

Life is really unpredictable and does not really go according to our plan. Everyday comes to us as a surprise package. Many people come and go but only few can stay longer. But most of the time we regret giving priority to wrong person.

I was a silent girl, who rarely smiled or enjoyed the phases of life but the past two years taught me how to smile and enjoy the life. It not only gave a new perspective to my life but also taught me a great lesson. I gave more priority to my friends even more than my study and it ended up teaching me a big lesson. Yeah, I was too much emotional but now I prefer being logical.

I will surely not stay crying over the past because past is gone and cannot be regained. Neither do I prefer to live in past like Gatsby nor want to meet up with the tragic end. So, I will continue doing what I have learned in these two years and that is to smile. And I even know that the best way to defeat your enemy is by smiling no matter what the situation is. So, I say goodbye to the old me and have feeling of newness within.

Dreams ...

I have got confusing feelings inside myself right now. Over thinking has always been one of my weakness but now at this moment, I am diving into my thoughts and seeing myself 5 years back. I am obviously distracted from what I dreamed 5 yeas back but I still cant believe that it has finally appeared.

In those days , a very new and young fan of Messi had convinced herself that it was just a matter of 5 years and after that she would complete her +2 and be with Messi whom she admired a lot. Yeah, of course she knew he had a girlfriend but that innocent girl said to her love that it was just 5 years that he had to wait for her. And today, she has grown mature enough but still inside her heart she loves him. Yeah, he maybe father of two children now but she still admires him the same.
But the only difference is that she has now understood she can meet him one day but he is meant to be with someone else.

So, her dream now is to meet him, share her feeling to him, and learn something from him so she can use it for her country. But, it is never too easy to do it as we say it. Yeah, of course she had faced many obstacles in the past but now she feels tired and her focus seems to be losing her aim. It is not a new thing for a person to be distracted during his/her journey but all that matters is those who overcome it and achieve what they actually deserve.

So, does she deserve to stay here and watch Messi just in different media or she deserves to meet him in real? Is she only made to imagine about her future or she has to act and work hard to achieve it ? Should she be wasting her time editing her photos with Messi or should she give her 100% to achieve her dream and click pictures in real with Messi? Her dream may have been changed with time and situation but she should not stop working to achieve what she deserves.

My own deceiving eyes .....

She always stayed alone in the crowd. The noise around her couldn't  break her silence. Obviously, she had made certain efforts to be what the people around her wanted her to be. She changed her appearance, became talkative, started communicating but all in vain. All her efforts rebounded. Now, she is tired of being what others want her to be.

In today's world which is full of lies and showoff, she wished for truth and simplicity. Love was all she sought in this faithless world. But every time she ended up being judged physically. Her simple heart could not be seen as the world was covered with the light of glamour. People found her caring words to be irritating. Maybe it was her own mistake to give priority and importance to those who never appreciated it.

It could be called coincidence if it had happened just once but it had been repeated time and again. She was the one who made wrong decisions and couldn't know about the peoples true nature. Her illusionary belief that "the eyes are the mirror of a person's heart" always deceived her. She was always cheated but she never knew.

But now everything is clear to her. Those eyes which helped her to make wrong decisions are full of tears now and her heart which was not visible to people is full of scars. She has no one to talk, share her pain because every body like using her when they are in need but find her irritating when she seeks help.

These days she keeps on wondering why people are so mad for false beauty, false pride, false reputation? She has no more desire to make close friends as she knows every one will judge her in the same way. The scars in her heart will not get healed so that she may not get any more of them.

Brave !

Life is incomplete without 'if'. When there is life , 'if' is mandatory. 'If' here represents the desire made my human beings. Until we have life , we have desires to fulfill. The day when we stop making desire , we may not have our life anymore.

Like every other individual, I have also decorated my life with 'if'. But few days back, life cracked a very serious joke on me. I lost all my senses and was not in the condition of drawing any conclusion. I knew that I was not the single individual who became the victim of this terrible fate. I knew that the things won't be always the same and one day I would get what I worth but it is really hard to convince own self.

I got a little motivated from the people around me and could still see the ray of hope but again the tragic fate attacked me. It was not as big as the first one but it did move me a bit. I got puzzled but this time I decided that there is no point in turning back. Whatever is written will happen by hook or by crook but I won't stop. I will keep moving ignoring these little hindrances because you can never grow strong without getting the pain.